Lately, I've been paying attention to my fetishes: what it is I like, what I want, what do I enjoy. I have to say that I've been surprising myself quite a bit. I've noticed that some of my fetishes have a 'my Lady only' label in my head. Others are just completely unexpected.
The first, and probably the biggest one in my eyes, is a foot fetish. Before I say anything, I would like to say that I don't like feet. I've never liked them. Not that they're gross, I just don't like them. I don't like them touching me. I HATE them touching my legs or my feet. I hate other people touching me with their feet. I hate touching other people's feet. I just do. I get a sick violating feel when I come into contact with feet.
There are times when I will put up with feet. My ex was always upset about my lack of 'foot touching' when we laid in bed so I was able to work past my disgust with her. Granted, it had to be on my terms and was still rare for me to be totally fine with it. But even then, I put up with it, I never enjoyed it.
When I look at my relationship with my Lady I'm noticing how much I don't mind her feet. Of course, this started because I knew she enjoyed foot worship and I wanted to give that to her. There was nothing in my head to try and pull me back. I began to give my Lady foot massages to try and show my gratitude and how much I enjoy being her submissive. I thought nothing of my odd hatred of feet, only that I could please my Lady in some small way. As time has passed I've realized myself pushing the boundaries of this particular fetish. I've wanted to poke at my own boundaries to see just how far I can go for my Lady. While I've still been too nervous/afraid to really try, I find myself imagining what it would be like to perhaps kiss her toes or even let my tongue touch her feet.
Maybe this doesn't seem like such a big deal, but for me this is monstrous! I don't believe I have ever willing and enjoyably put my mouth on or near another human's foot. And despite my disliking of the human foot I find myself enjoying these fantasies and almost looking forward to being able to perform them. I am noticing that I can very honestly say that I would like to kiss my Lady's feet.
This has also brought up a high heel fetish and kissing/licking the shoes. When I think of this, I not only see it as an extension of my growing foot fetish but as something I enjoy for a completely different reason. It's almost, humiliating to lick/kiss someone's shoe and oddly enough I find that exciting!
And this brings me to my next point of an unexpected fetish growing within myself: pet play. There are several reasons why this particular fetish fascinates me. The first is that I am a voyeur. I've accepted this and since have started realizing how much of a voyeur I really am. I've started looking at pet play simply because I love to watch. It is so interesting to me. The dynamic, the rules, the look, the communication, everything. It's just so amusing to watch and I love it.
Another portion that strikes my interest is the humiliation. This is a fetish that I've been a bit too afraid to even explore. It has always confused me and I want to one day understand it more. When looking at pet play I like to see when the submissive is in the role of the pet. They act like the pet, they have rules like the pet, etc. Perhaps this doesn't necessarily have to be animal-related things. But I love the idea of stepping out of our industrialized mind and into our more primal mind-set. I love the idea of eating from a bowl/plate on the floor or being fed bites. I love the idea of 'this is your spot, you stay in this spot if not beside me'. I love the idea of having a leash. I love the idea of simply amusing my Lady in whatever ridiculous way she chooses simply because it amuses her. I am in love with the idea of following an entirely new set of rules where you have to think not as their submissive, but as their pet. As their companion and play thing.
I feel like pet play isn't about just dressing up like a kitten and saying 'meow'. I do feel there is a very large mind to it that I would love to explore one day.
Those are a couple of the fetishes that have been on my mind a lot lately. They are rather unexpected for me in my mind for various reasons but are nevertheless moving their way very quickly up my 'I want to try' list. The one thing that they do have in common I've noticed is very simple: my Lady. I will not be lining up to kiss any random person's feet—or even friend's feet for that matter— anytime soon. But it doesn't feel like I'm doing something I don't enjoy for my Lady either. I honestly enjoy being able to please her, even if it is something I would otherwise dislike. The fact that it is for her makes it enjoyable for me.
Just thought I'd share my thoughts for today~